Babies, Babies Everywhere

There is definitely something in the water. I don't think there has ever been a time in all my life when there were more women with infants, pregnant, or trying to become pregnant. Some of them are friends, family, and others are acquaintances whom I come into contact with on a regular basis. I am genuinely happy for each and every one of them and as a friend I want good things for their lives. Babies are a miracle and a blessing. Yet, with each of their milestones and happinesses I find myself hurting more and more. Most of my nights are spent crying on my husband's shoulder. I try so hard to go about life as normally as I can, but the fact is that I have a new normal now. I am a mother who has lost a child. My feelings aren't something I can pack away in a box and shove away in my mind. They are here to stay. I am hoping that with time things will get easier. But, I am not sure that they ever will.